April 8, 2020
  • 5:53 pm Joe Biden to address impeachment and Trump-Ukraine whistleblower call , live stream
  • 5:53 pm President Trump’s 2020 State of the Union address and the Democratic response (FULL LIVE STREAM)
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  • 5:53 pm Temple University Student’s Viral Tik Tok Video Calling North Philadelphia ‘The Ghetto’ Causes Outra
  • 4:52 pm @TorontoPolice News Conference Re: Homicide #54/2016 Jarryl Hagley, 17 | Fri Oct 21st, 1pm


-Today, the president reeled off a deranged tirade
at the White House, where he celebrated
his sham impeachment acquittal with his Republican
co-conspirators. For more on this,
it’s time for “A Closer Look.” [ Cheers and applause ] ♪♪ After his acquittal in the Senate impeachment trial
yesterday, Trump was eager to celebrate — even at events where
it wasn’t entirely appropriate. For example, this morning, he attended the annual
National Prayer Breakfast in Washington,
and before he even sat down, Trump started holding up
the front pages of multiple newspapers
showing people he was acquitted, a stunt which he then repeated
at a press conference a few hours later
at the White House. He finally found the one job
he’s qualified for — newspaper boy.
[ Laughter ] [ As Trump ] Extra! Extra! Extra! Extra! Read all about me! Trump “a-quitter.” [ Laughter ] [ Normal voice ]
Then Trump took aim at both Utah senator Mitt Romney, the only Republican
who voted to convict Trump, and also House Speaker
Nancy Pelosi. Romney cited his faith
in explaining his vote, and Pelosi had said
many times that she prays
for the president. and Trump decided
to attack them for it. -I don’t like people who use
their faith as justification for doing what they know is wrong. Nor do I like people who say,
“I pray for you.” When they know that
that’s not so. [ Laughter ] -Because what is prayer, if not
a time to air petty grievances? Then Trump’s son Don Jr. tried to back him up on Twitter
this morning, writing, “The likelihood of Nancy Pelosi
praying for Trump is about the same
as the likelihood of Satan running around
quoting the scriptures.” All right. Okay. Let’s see if Satan has ever
quoted the scriptures. -2 Corinthians, right? 2 Corinthians 3:17. That’s the whole ball game. [ Cheers and applause ] -Even when Trump is reading
directly from the Bible, he sounds like
he’s making it up. He sounds like he’s trying
to distract a priest while his fellow altar boys
steal the communion wine. [ As Trump ]
2 Corinthians, oh. There were —
Wasn’t just one Corinthian. There were two. That’s what — That’s what
really made ’em quite a team. And, you know, you just can’t
beat 2 Corinthians. I mean, that’s the whole
ball game. [ Normal voice ] Then Trump
moved over to the White House, where he decided to hold
his deranged victory speech or press conference
or whatever it was. In fact, even Trump himself didn’t seem to know
what quite to call it. -This is really not
a news conference. It’s not a speech. It’s not anything. -Then why are we here? He sounds like Simon Cowell
berating a contestant on “America’s Got Talent.” [ As Cowell ] It’s not a song.
It’s not a dance. It’s not anything. [ Laughter, cheers,
and applause ] [ Normal voice ]
That might be the only thing Trump
was right about. This really wasn’t a speech or
a press conference or anything. It was a chance to lash out
at critics, spin wild conspiracy theories,
and sooth his wounded ego. In fact, he spent most
of his time gleefully shouting out
to fellow Republicans who helped him cover up
his crimes. And the shout-outs kept
getting weirder and weirder. -Mitch McConnell,
I want to tell you, you did a fantastic job. And Mike Braun,
you have done some great job. Thank you very much. Josh Hawley,
I want to thank you. You were right
from the beginning. Man, did I make a good choice. But Mike Lee is a brilliant guy.
He’s difficult. Kevin, man, did you do a job. Lucky you’re there. Jim Jordan. When I first got to know Jim,
I said, uh, “Huh, never wears a jacket. The hell’s going on? He’s obviously
very proud of his body.” -Proud of his body? Have you —
Have you seen Jim Jordan? He looks like
a ventriloquist dummy who got cut
from Jeff Dunham’s act. Also, it is so telling,
so telling that Trump thinks not wearing a jacket
means you’re proud of your body because Trump does everything
he can to cover up his body. Not only does he wear those
baggy pants and long ties, but he also wears
that giant bulky coat that makes him look like he just
snuck out of the White House with all the valuable china
stuffed in his pockets. Then, at one point,
Trump shouted out Iowa senator Chuck Grassley
and claimed Grassley had supposedly scared
former FBI Director James Comey into confessing to Comey’s
supposed secret plot to take down Trump. -A man who got James Comey
to choke. And he was just talking
in his regular voice. He’s got this voice
that scares people. You know, people from Iowa
can be very tough. We’re doing very well in Iowa,
but I’ll tell you, Chuck Grassley,
he’s looking at Comey… [ Deep voice ] “Well,
you tell me. What did you say?” -All right, that sounds
very scary, so let’s compare this scary
fictional version of Grassley to the actual Grassley
trying to gavel down a Democrat at a Senate hearing. -This committee, sir…
[ Gavel banging ] …is in violation
of even the values I’ve heard you talk about
time and time again, the ideals that we should have.
What is the rush? [ Banging continues ]
What are we trying to hide by not having
the documents out front? What is with the rush?
What are we hiding by not letting
those documents come out? You’ve called for documents —
you, yourself. Let me at the documents.
We thought there should be more. We have not received
the documents that you have even called for. -He’s not a senator.
He’s a metronome. Looks like a grandpa who’s been
trying to hammer one nail into the deck for eight hours. “Grandpa, just let me
use the drill.” [ Gruff voice ]
I don’t need any help! Let me do it myself! [ Normal voice ] Although,
there was one imaginary friend Trump couldn’t introduce
because he wasn’t in the room, but Trump said he wished
he had been there so that he could have given him
an introduction, too. -“Honest Abe” Lincoln. A lot of people
forget Abe Lincoln. I wish he were here. I’d give
him one hell of an introduction. [ Laughter ] But he was a Republican. Abe Lincoln, Honest Abe. -That’s right.
Trump wishes he could have introduced Abraham Lincoln
in his speech today. Of course, if Trump did, he would immediately make it
about him and somehow insult Lincoln. [ As Trump ] Honest Abe.
There he is. Abe Lincoln, everybody. So honest,
maybe the most honest, although some people say
I’m a little more honest. So Abe over there,
he’s laughing. He’s number two,
the second-most honest. I’m number one. I told you not to go
to that theater, Abe! I told you. I told you plays were boring,
but of course, you’re fine. Nothing happened to you, so I don’t know
why the audience groaned. You’re here in this timeline. In this timeline, you’re fine. You’re 200 years old
and you’re right there and you’re laughing at me
and we’re friends. [ Normal voice ] Trump’s
rambling non-speech fever dream or whatever the hell it was
was really just a showcase for our perpetually aggrieved and wounded president
to nurse his ego, relive old glories,
and lash out at random critics and shout away
imagined opponents. For example, Trump claimed
that his three years as president have been marred by traitors
trying to take him down and kept using a few
insane phrases in particular. -It was evil. It was corrupt. It was dirty cops. It was leakers and liars. The bad ones, the leakers,
the liars, the dirty cops. Horrible dirty cops. When I fired that sleaze bag,
he was the top scum. We caught him in the act. Dirty cops. -Is he whining about impeachment
or narrating a movie trailer? [ As Trump ]
It was the bad ones, the leakers,
the liars, the dirty cops. And the only one who could
take them down was Serpi-Dope. [ Laughter ] [ Normal voice ]
I hope this is a reminder to everyone who thought Trump has somehow managed
to restrain himself during the State of the Union
two days ago. The Trump we saw today
was the real Trump, and it’s the Trump
we’re gonna keep seeing for the next nine months
until the election, because it’s pretty clear from
his vengeful celebratory tone that Trump wanted this to be
the week that for all intents and purposes, he kicked off
his 2020 re-election campaign. Although I’m not sure Trump
ever really stopped campaigning. He spends more time in arenas
than Jon Bon Jovi. [ As Trump ]
You ready to rock, Kansas? [ Normal voice ]
“This is Missouri, you idiot!” [ Cheers and applause ] For example, during his
White House tirade today, Trump bragged about his
near-unanimous victory in the Republican Iowa
caucus on Monday, even though he’s
the incumbent president and everyone expected him
to win easily. But Trump still sent a big team to Iowa on Monday
as a show of force, including his adult
gargoyle sons, Eric and Don Jr. And Don Jr. relayed what Iowans
have been telling him throughout his time
campaigning in the state. -Honestly, the biggest thing
I get is thanks. It’s someone telling us
thank you for the sacrifices
that your family is making, because you didn’t need
this job, right? The presidency wasn’t the next
natural progression for my father like it
would have been for Hillary where it’s her turn.
Right? He’d actually done things
in the real world. He needed this job, frankly,
like a hole in the head, especially understanding
the resistance that he was gonna get. -Ah, but are you sure he doesn’t
already have a hole in his head? Listen to him talk and tell me he doesn’t have
some hole in his head. -10,000 known or suspested
gang members. Advising lawmarkers. Will not be tolerited. -Yes, you see,
Democratic lawmarkers suspested that Trump
had committed a crime, but ultimately Republicans
decided it could be tolerited. That was Monday,
and then on Wednesday, Trump was hoping his week
would be propelled even further by an acquittal
in the Senate on party lines, where he expected to receive
100% support from Republicans. And while it’s true
that Trump was acquitted, his good news was stepped on
by the fact that Republican senator
Mitt Romney sided with Democrats
and voted to convict him. Romney rained on Trump’s parade,
which is bad news for Trump, because he doesn’t know
how to use an umbrella. But seriously,
even with the acquittal, that one vote
is a historical stain that will remain
on Trump’s presidency forever. That fact’s gonna show up on Trivial Pursuit
cards years from now. “Who is the only president
in history to have a senator
of his own party vote to remove him from office? Hint — The answer is not…” -Abe Lincoln, Honest Abe. -Now, Romney knew he would pay a political price
for this decision because Trump allies had already
warned that if Republicans
vote against the president, your head will be on a pike. And Romney was asked
about that danger in an interview on Fox News. -You realize this is war. Donald Trump will never
forgive you for this. -There’s a hymn that is sung
in my church. It’s an old protestant hymn
which is “Do what is right,
let the consequence follow.” -There’s probably no better way
to flummox Donald Trump than by quoting a religious hymn because he has no idea
what it means. When Trump hears the phrase,
“old protestant hymn,” he probably thinks
he’s referring to a member of his cabinet. [ As Trump ] Oh, yeah, I got
a bunch of old protestant “hims” and I got one protestant “her.” [ Normal voice ]
And sure enough, Trump did fire back at Romney
yesterday with a bizarre ad aimed at a member
of his own party accusing Romney of being
a secret Democratic traitor. But I’m not sure the ad had
quite the damaging effect on Romney
that Trump hoped it would have. -Slick, slippery, stealthy. Mitt Romney had us fooled. Posing as a Republican,
he tried to infiltrate Trump’s administration
as Secretary of State. Now his cover’s blown, exposed by news reports
as a Democrat secret asset. -Look, I’m no Mitt Romney
superfan, but you do realize this ad makes
him look incredibly cool, right? I mean, I didn’t think
it was possible to take a boring private
equity robot like Romney and turn him into James Bond,
but somehow Trump did it. Literally wearing sunglasses, and you describe him as slick,
stealthy, and a secret asset. You might as well give him
a martini and Aston Martin and put him next
to Pussy Galore. [ As Romney ] Uh, Ms. Galore,
do you mind if I read you an old protestant hymn? [ As Galore ]
Call me Pussy, Mitt. [ As Romney ]
Oh, no, no, no, no, no. No, no, no,
I’m not gonna do that. Definitely not. [ Normal voice ] And yet,
while Romney stood alone among Republicans
in holding Trump accountable, others who voted to acquit Trump
tried to dodge questions about their votes, especially
the deeply vulnerable senators facing re-election
in swing states in 2020. Take Maine senator
Susan Collins, who sided with Trump
on impeachment, but also tried to claim
in an interview with Fox News last night that Trump
had learned his lesson. -Will something in you
be disappointed if you never see any evidence
that he has learned a lesson or if he does something
like this again? -Very much so. I hoped that the president
would have learned from the fact that
he was impeached by the House. There were so many of us who
are Republicans in the Senate who are very critical
of the call. The call was wrong. Parts of the call were fine. -What do you mean,
parts of the call were fine? “He nailed the ‘Hello,’ and I thought the ‘Goodbye’
was solid, too. Put it back in the cradle
when he was done.” Also, why do you think Trump
would have learned anything? Just today, he said
the call was perfect again. Trump is incapable of learning. Doesn’t matter what the subject
is — spelling, geography,
he never learns. Remember, this is a guy
who misspelled his wife’s name
and his own name and who has literally invented
multiple fake countries. -Tanzania. Nambia. -Yes — Tanzania and Nambia. This guy is the president, and he doesn’t even know
basic geography. If you said “Bangladesh”
to Trump, he’d go… [ As Trump ]
Why? Is Ladesh hot? [ Laughter, cheers,
and applause ] [ Normal voice ] Collins
was then asked if Trump had given her any assurances that he had learned his lesson,
and she admitted he had not. -Did he give you any assurance
that he would not do something like that again,
accept foreign help in anything related to someone
that might be running with him? Did you talk to him
about it at all? -I’ve had no conversations
with him throughout the trial. -So, why do you have that
feeling that he has changed, that he learned a lesson? -Well, I may not
be correct on that. It’s more aspirational
on my part. -Oh, it’s aspirational.
That’s nice. Do you have one of those
motivational posters up in your office, you know, like the one with the cat
that says, “Hang in there.
He might not be a criminal.” Then there was Colorado senator
Cory Gardner, another deeply vulnerable
Republican facing a tough re-election
in a swing state. Gardner also sided with Trump
on impeachment. Last night,
on a local news station, he was asked repeatedly if
Trump’s actions were appropriate and would not answer
the question, while also insisting
he was answering the question. -Do you believe it’s appropriate for the president
of the United States to ask a foreign leader to
investigate a political rival? Yes or no?
-That wasn’t the question that we had last night,
or that we had in impeachment. -Was the president’s behavior
appropriate, though? -But that wasn’t the question. -So, clearly, not answering
that question. -Well, I did answer the question
about impeachment. -No, you didn’t.
These guys all have the same Trump brain disease
where they think they can just Jedi mind trick us into not
believing what we’re seeing. That’s why Trump’s always
doing that thing with his hands, you know? He’s trying to pull
an Obi Wan Kenobi on us, but instead, he just
looks like he’s playing an invisible accordion. [ As Trump ] Those aren’t
the droids you’re looking for. You guys want to hear a polka? You want to hear a polka? [ Normal voice ] The fundamental
tenets of Trumpism and the modern Republican party
are grievance and paranoia, and that was on full display in Trump’s deranged
press conference today. But vulnerable Republicans
in swing states are struggling
to defend that behavior because a majority
of Americans in polls still believe that the
president’s crimes cannot be… -Tolerited.
-This has been “A Closer Look.” [ Cheers and applause ] ♪♪

Robin Kshlerin

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